| About Domestic Violence |
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| Camden House 882 - 7858 |
Spousal abuse and battery are used for one purpose: to gain and maintain
total control over the victim. In addition to physical violence, abusers use the
following tactics to exert power over their wives or partners:
Dominance: Abusive individuals need to feel in charge of the relationship.
They will make decisions for you and the family, tell you what to do, and expect
you to obey without question. Your abuser may treat you like a servant, child,
or even as his possession.
Humiliation: An abuser will do everything he can to make you feel bad about
yourself, or defective in some way. After all, if you believe you're worthless and
that no one else will want you, you're less likely to leave. Insults, name-calling,
shaming, and public put-downs are all weapons of abuse designed to erode
your self-esteem and make you feel powerless.
Isolation: In order to increase your dependence on him, an abusive partner
will cut you off from the outside world. He may keep you from seeing family or
friends, or even prevent you from going to work or school. You may have to ask
permission to do anything, go anywhere, or see anyone.
Threats: Abusers commonly use threats to keep their victims from leaving or
to scare them into dropping charges. Your abuser may threaten to hurt or kill
you, your children, other family members, or even pets. He may also threaten to
commit suicide, file false charges against you, or report you to child services.
Intimidation: Your abuser may use a variety of intimation tactics designed to
scare you into submission. Such tactics include making threatening looks or
gestures, smashing things in front of you, destroying property, hurting your
pets, or putting weapons on display. The clear message is that if you don't
obey, there will be violent consequences.
Denial and blame: Abusers are very good at making excuses for the
inexcusable. They will blame their abusive and violent behavior on a bad
childhood, a bad day, and even on the victims of their abuse. Your abuser may
minimize the abuse or deny that it occurred. He will commonly shift the
responsibility onto you: Somehow, his violence and abuse is your fault.
Source: Domestic Abuse Intervention Project, MN
total control over the victim. In addition to physical violence, abusers use the
following tactics to exert power over their wives or partners:
Dominance: Abusive individuals need to feel in charge of the relationship.
They will make decisions for you and the family, tell you what to do, and expect
you to obey without question. Your abuser may treat you like a servant, child,
or even as his possession.
Humiliation: An abuser will do everything he can to make you feel bad about
yourself, or defective in some way. After all, if you believe you're worthless and
that no one else will want you, you're less likely to leave. Insults, name-calling,
shaming, and public put-downs are all weapons of abuse designed to erode
your self-esteem and make you feel powerless.
Isolation: In order to increase your dependence on him, an abusive partner
will cut you off from the outside world. He may keep you from seeing family or
friends, or even prevent you from going to work or school. You may have to ask
permission to do anything, go anywhere, or see anyone.
Threats: Abusers commonly use threats to keep their victims from leaving or
to scare them into dropping charges. Your abuser may threaten to hurt or kill
you, your children, other family members, or even pets. He may also threaten to
commit suicide, file false charges against you, or report you to child services.
Intimidation: Your abuser may use a variety of intimation tactics designed to
scare you into submission. Such tactics include making threatening looks or
gestures, smashing things in front of you, destroying property, hurting your
pets, or putting weapons on display. The clear message is that if you don't
obey, there will be violent consequences.
Denial and blame: Abusers are very good at making excuses for the
inexcusable. They will blame their abusive and violent behavior on a bad
childhood, a bad day, and even on the victims of their abuse. Your abuser may
minimize the abuse or deny that it occurred. He will commonly shift the
responsibility onto you: Somehow, his violence and abuse is your fault.
Source: Domestic Abuse Intervention Project, MN
| You may also call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800 - 787 - 3224. |
| If you feel you are in immediate danger, please call 911 |
Abuse: The abuser lashes out with aggressive or violent behavior.
The abuse is a power play designed to show the victim "who is boss."
Guilt: After the abusive episode, the abuser feels guilt, but not over
what he's done to the victim. The guilt is over the possibility of being
caught and facing consequences.
Rationalization or excuses: The abuser rationalizes what he's
done. He may come up with a string of excuses or blame the victim for
his own abusive behavior—anything to shift responsibility from himself.
"Normal" behavior: The abuser does everything he can to regain
control and keep the victim in the relationship. He may act as if
nothing has happened, or he may turn on the charm. This peaceful
honeymoon phase may give the victim hope that the abuser has really
changed this time.
The abuse is a power play designed to show the victim "who is boss."
Guilt: After the abusive episode, the abuser feels guilt, but not over
what he's done to the victim. The guilt is over the possibility of being
caught and facing consequences.
Rationalization or excuses: The abuser rationalizes what he's
done. He may come up with a string of excuses or blame the victim for
his own abusive behavior—anything to shift responsibility from himself.
"Normal" behavior: The abuser does everything he can to regain
control and keep the victim in the relationship. He may act as if
nothing has happened, or he may turn on the charm. This peaceful
honeymoon phase may give the victim hope that the abuser has really
changed this time.
| The Cycle of Violence Domestic Violence falls into a fairly predictable pattern or cycle of violence |
| Domestic Violence Defined The Official Georgia Code defines domestic violence as any felony, battery, simple battery, simple assault, assault, stalking, criminal damage to property, unlawful restraint and criminal trespass between past or present spouses, persons who are parents of the same child, parents and children, stepparents and stepchildren, foster parents and foster children and persons living or formerly living in the same household. (O.C.G.A. #19-13-1) |
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